struggling to find mindfulness and happiness in a chaotic world

Finding Inspiration Again

Finding Inspiration Again

I am a Buddha. Or am I? Six years ago, I discovered Buddhism. Five years ago, I started attending a sangha that practiced Thich Nhat Hanh’s style of Zen Buddhism, then a Nichiren Shu temple, then a Soto Zen meditation group that met in a Unitarian Universalist Church. Four years...

Simple Relief

Walking Contradiction

I Like Details. I have been obsessed with details as long as I can remember. That’s why I enjoy being a project manager by profession because I get to organize a multitude of dependent tasks. That’s why I enjoyed being a web developer for years because I could obsess over something...

Meditation Study Journal #3

Meditation Study Journal #3

Two nights ago I meditated to a guided recording of Sharon Salzberg on the topic of “Metta,” which is one of my favorite guided meditations. “Metta” means loving-kindness. It is the well-known Buddhist meditation that involves saying a variation on the following: May I be safe May I be happy...

Meditation Study Journal #2

Meditation Study Journal #2

While I should be meditating every evening, I have had a rough time returning to form. It is somewhat challenging conditioning myself to the idea of again meditating every day without fail. Yesterday I meditated for five minutes when I awoke. Last night, I committed myself to meditating for about...

Meditation Study Journal #1

Meditation Study Journal #1

Last night I meditated for the first time in over six months. It was long overdue. For someone who made it a habit to meditate for 30-60 minutes every evening when I was at the peak of my meditation practice in 2009-2010, the fact that I had gone so long...

The Advantages of NOT Being the First Child

The Advantages of NOT Being the First Child

My two sisters (both of them older than me) like to joke about how I was the “golden child” and earned privileges as a child that they did not have (air conditioning, no curfew, no spankings, and so on). This may or may not be true. It was so long...